poetryisthesoulsexpressionandthemindsvoice...

Ok Ok OK! So I lied... but there is two reasons why I'm back. 1): I worked out my problems with the person(s) who had I thought had a problem. and 2): because what the fuck else am I supposed to do with my spare time? lol So with that being said I'm BACK!!!! To all of the 8 people who follow my blog anyways. Lol


So I been writing a lot more rhymes and poetry lately. It's becoming a time killer. Whenever something hits me I just write it down. So I guess this writing shit is my new shit. Along with writing jokes too. I realized that I don't just wanna be one thing. I don't wanna be confined to one platform. I wanna do it ALL! Just wanna take it one step at a time. So whichever comes 1st I figure Imma just kill it. Only time and God will tell.

With that being said, I am going to post another poem which I thought was a rhyme, but it seemed to have more poetry feel to it. So I knew I had to let it rock.



Ooh its "Untitled":


"Master of my mind/
and master of my time/
and master of my fly/
and master of my rhyme/
and bastard to the people who choose to be blind/
ones who'd rather shoot glocks then elevate minds/
ones who'd rather push rocks just get by/
watching innocents get high, just to die/
trade in your soul, just to make a dime/
hoping you get paid, just to get a dime/
and she looking fine, thick in the thighs/
but you look her in the eyes and her heart tells lies/
She don't love you, she loves those dollar signs/
And you'll lose your mind before you lose her fine/
becoming consumed in the money and her artificial love/
thriving off the hate/love you receive at the club/
living for the iil will you get from your peers/
"FUCK BOOKS" you'd rather get dubs/
You need to hear the hood give cheers/
Remember the stars see you/
and the stars will never forget you/
So when its time to join the stars, they will dismiss you.







OK! So I think its really wack. Maybe you'll like it. Maybe you won't. Only the comments can tell. dik lol. I have this habit of writing only a couple lines and then just freestyling the rest of it.



I read somewhere on MySpace once "If they ain't hating, you doing something wrong!".
And I remembered a saying I heard on The Boondocks: "So you judge your success and status by the amount of ill will you generate from those among you... Wow."
^
^
^
^
^
Thought I would put that out there. lol you earthlings you.
^
^
^
^
^
Running outta words... and outta bullets.. lol



Peace and Salutations Earthlings,


C.H.-ill the Martian

F.eeling misU.nderstoodC.onstantlyK.ills..... Me...

I'm officially going to stop blogging in the next few hours. This shit has caused me nothing but unnecessary drama. Everytime I come on here and try to speak thoughts and feelings somebody always gets mad. I mean FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CAN I LIVE?!?!?!?!? Shit! I thought this was a site where people come and speak thoughts and post anything they feel like that independently express them as the person they truly are. I'm a person who easily falls for the sweetest smile or nicest body really quick but I hide it with this exterior of being a FUCKING ASSHOLE. And that's not really who I am naturally. I've always been a genuinely nice person and because I have been taken advantage of in the past I decided to say never again. So I became an asshole and I started to like it. I realized nobody will ever pull fast one on this muthafucking niggah EVER again. But I met somebody recently who, along with other friends and family, kept telling me you don't have to always be an asshole. So I thought you know I'm reaching an age where this asshole shit is getting outdated. So I thought maybe its God's way of telling me that I need to change my ways. So I decided to make the change for myself. But with any big change in your life, it always has it doubts and its ups and downs, but if you feel like in your mind, you know what your doing is going to leave you better off, then why not try to make the change. I said in my previous blog that being nice sucks. And I'm not happy with the change I'm making. I also implied pretty much that pinkstarburst was the one who was the driving force behind my change. But its not true. I was just honestly really struggling with all this because I'm scared that the same thing is going to happen before. Now I think pinkstarburst don't want shit to do with me. That's fine. I'm not gonna make her even be my FRIEND if she doesn't wunna be. But I refuse for her not to know the truth. So there it is. For everybody.









Charles Wesley Hopkins

randomthoughtsbecomingrealities...

"Your nobody.....Till somebody......KILLS you"


Random thoughts running through my brain. I feel officially single and ready to make my next move as far as relationships are concern. Which that move is: NOTHING! I don't even know if I'm ready to be a boyfriend. I'm trying this new thing called "Being Nice" and it sucks. I mean I don't know why I feel like I'm getting shitted on emotionally. I'm still feeling like I say I'm not like every next niggah but yet I'm feeling like my actions make me look like I'm every next niggah. I feel like I'm changing who I am. And not saying changing who you are isn't bad. But if I'm not happy with it, then why am I changing?




pinkstarburst is annoying me! Maybe its just because I been trying not to be an asshole to her. I guess that's the good thing about being nice. She is still cool. And I realized one reason why I'm attracted to her. Probably one of the weirdest reasons ever but well its a "Chill" reason. She looks like one of my favorite porn stars kinda. Not like a spitting image but she favors her a lot. She still gets on my nerves. But she still ok in my book. I can see us being good friends regardless..........question is.......is that all chill wants??????????




Thinkinaboutit-aint I? L-M-[C.H.-ill]-A-O!





I LOVE HOT WEATHER! This weekend was sooooooooooooooo nice! I played mad sports and enjoyed the "view" where I was at. Shout out to my niggah Cool. Blessed me and my brothers with probably the best weekend we've had in a while. Which is nothing more than a pre-cursor to the Summer of '09. I LOVE Y'ALL NIGGAHS! DETERMINED NOBODIES/UNCOOL MOVEMENT!




Cudi gotta new mixtape out. DJ E-V presents KiD CuDi "Dat Kid from Cleveland". Shit is Ill. "Daps & Pounds" is my joint. Check that out. You can download it at datnewcudi.com or livemixtapes.com.



I'm super hungry. Think I'm gonna eat some of this delicious ass spaghetti sauce my moms made. Or I'm gonna get some food somewhere. Hopefully Two brothers or PizzaU. Ahh who knows, right? But I am gonna get some grub...
^
^
^
^
^
^
^
^
^
^
^
^


Kevin Hart - I'm a Grown Little Man.... Funny!



^
^
^
^
^
^
^
^
Running outta words....and Time lol....




Peace and Salutations Earthlings,


C.H.-ill The Martian

pinkstarburst..... ;-)

I finally figured out how to add an imeem song to my blog! That is my theme song for 2009. I feel like I figured out a hard process but its not really that difficult. But I'm glad I figured it out.. hopefully I cant leran how to put a custom playlist up. lol IM still a little rusty with this earth technology........ ;-) lol
^
^
^
^
^
^
^
^
I'm talking to "Starburst" rite now... She isn't feeling too good..... :-( I can't make her feel better... Well I can but.....lol our relationship hasn't reached that level yet. But who knows? I still have random thoughts of "chic-o-stick". I always manage to do this to myself. Find or become attractedto more than one chick. But I can't help it. What one girl doesnt have the other might. and since I'm single, Its not like I'm doing anything wrong. Just weighing my options. Anyways, I hope a sign comes soon so I know where to focus my attention and love towards. Only time will tell.
^
^
^
^
^
^
^
KiD CuDi gotta new mixtape out. "Dat Kid from Cleveland". Please downlaod and support. http://www.datnewcudi.com/.
^
^
^
^
^
^
^
^

KiD CuDi- Day N Nite (Crookers remix)


^
^
^
^
^
^
^
Running outta words.... shout out to starburst..... ;-)



Peace and much love to all y'all.....Earthlings,



C.H.-ill the Martian

convincedindecision...

You know I've reached a point where all I can do is stare into the night sky and tell God that I tried my best. I thought I was being respectful and honest of everyone and everyone's feelings but apparently I'm nothing more than a greedy, selfish, manipulative asshole who is fucking over everybody for my better interest. So I think I'm at the point where whoever feels offended by me and my actions/words, then apparently that's a personal problem. I never did anything to disrespect ANYBODY. Or at least I thought. So I'm through expending the mental energy and space on a issue I feel is unnecessary or frugal. For those of you who can interpret my actions and words how they are meant to be interpreted, I give you my greatest gratitude. You obviously have understood and embraced TheMartian Charles Hopkins. I'm glad y'all are in my life and I know our relationship, whatever level it may reach, will be real and beautiful.
^
^
^
^
^
NOW! That's finished..... I apologize for that... Just needed to vent..
^
^
^
^
^
^
Got super high last night for 4/20. Idk what the fuck kinda tree that was but....OOO WEEEE! Shit was super strong. Had my headphones on and was Zoning out to Charles Hamilton's "Pink Lavalamp" mixtape. Then I got to the bonus track called "Writing in the Sky" and for some reason it had so much more meaning to it. I reminisced about my whole life. I realized that music really is more than just a form of entertainment. Its an artform. An expression. An outlet. And it has been apart of my life for my WHOLE life. I love music.
^
^
^
^
^
^
^
^
Talked to Starburst last night. We had our first phone conversation. She's funny. She's a little cholo. ;) I think she would like it on mars. The people would treat her nice. dik. I really think she might be a good change for me. She is really cool. And we get along. Plus I guess with me being a geek and a nerd and somewhat eccentric, she seems to like me regardless. I like the fact that I can be myself around her. She is growing on me. Dik blogspot. What do you guys think?
^
^
^
^
^
^
NBA PLAYOFFS! LET'S GO SIXERS AND HORNETS!!
^
^
^
^
^
Running outta words...and I'm hungry...




Peace and much love to all y'all earthlings,

C.H.-ill the Martian

Candy Coated Raindrops...

"Skinamarink-e-dink-e-dink/ Skinamarink-e-doo!"


That's the kinda natural (in both aspects.......;) ) high im on right now in my life.
Everything is making NO sense in my life that it makes PERFECT sense. I got a "Starburst" (she doesnt like NowandLater) who is very cool and gorgeous just I don't really know her yet and I'm really digging her but I refuse to start something so soon. I got a "Chic-o-stick" who I would love to give another chance and run at a relationship but I refuse to be somewhere I'm not trusted. and I got a "Reese's" who I get the feeling is thinking I'm playing her and is getting fed up with the wondering. And judging by how this looks, you probably think I'm a player. Well the answer is no. I havent lied to any of them. I like them all. I would love to have the opportunity to take them to my home planet and show them how my native people live and exist. BUT! the reality is, these three "treats" lol arent the type you could or should dog out. They deserve the upmost respect and attention from ANY male. Not just me. Don't get it twisted, If I could have all three LORD KNOWS I would but I can't. So I hope they don't think its a competition. I'm no prize or anything worth winning, its more of a decision in my mind. The constant struggle in my mind. I was once asked how my thought process works. ANSWER: Watch a movie called "Funny Games" starring Tim Roth and Naomi Watts. They play one song constant throughout the movie. If you figure out what the song is, thats the best comparison to my thought process. That and J Dilla Instrumnetals. So back to my subject, I hope when they read this, they don't get confused. I feel personally I don't DESERVE any of you. But I know I've earned the PRIVILEGE. So the statement still lingers: Everything is making NO sense in my life that it makes PERFECT sense. What does this mean? It means only one thing: LIVE. I don't have time to try and figure it out. I just have to live. and let.......wait for it....... godallahjehovahbuddhashivasomehigherpower handle the rest. (outta respect for my non-christian readers......weirdo lol) Hopefully I get to indulge in one of these delectible "treats". But probably not. O well. I still have mars. lol dik.





SHOUTS TO CuDi, Hedgehog, and Roth!!



Running outta words.....and candy..... lol you earthlings you!




Peace and Salutations Earthlings,


C.H.-ill the Martian

la di da da da... la di da da da...

OVER! Been listening to the illest lyricist of 2009. Asher Roth.


So She's back on my mind blogspot! BUT! It's not the same she. For privacy reasons, her name shall not b revealed. We'll call her "NowandLater"! (shouts to charles hamilton). So me and NowAndLater talked today. She's cool. Hysterically funny. I don't think she be trying though. She's becoming a breath of fresh air. Someone who helps me escape the reality that is my life. We have great conversations. But anybody who engages in conversation with me usually has good conversation. lol She's SOO super fucking cute. I don't even know if thats a sentence but thats the only way I can describe it. lol dik (don't I know) anyways, If there is gunna be anything between us I wunna take it SUPER slow. I can't rush this. The way I'm feeling and what I just went through, I refuse to mess up again. I really like my "ladybug" but she doesnt trust or believe in me. And it frustrates me. Because this is the one time in my entire life I really changed who I completely am in a relationship and as a person to be ladybug's perfect boyfriend. I never gave her a reason not to trust me. Not to believe in me. I was 110% + 10. and in the end, ladybug always said "I trust you. I believe you." and then constantly questioned my integrity and told me that "I wasn't in it to win it." SOOOO! I'm at my breaking point. LADYBUG! If your listening wiht your eyes right now. THATS IT! That's how I feel. TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT! I told you I would love to try again but Im not gonna force you if you don't trust me. And I'm not gunna try if you don't believe in me. BUT i'm DAMN sure not gunna stop living. Who knows if somebody else? possibly NowAndLater.........;). hopefully. But Like I said Imma treat her like a jawbreaker.. Nice and slow. NowAndLater seems fun. Wanna hang out with her sumtime. Hopefully when she isnt BLACKIN on me for being rude. lol dik. (dont bite that either, earthlings.) But she is cool guys. I hope I get the opportunity to be with her. I ring to my planet and show her something different. lol You earthlings are so lucky. You get to enjoy this feeling love like its toys from the dollar store. Something you easily break and abuse. Somethingyou have no real love for. Me on the other hand, I enjoy love regardless of whether I got it at the dollar store or the big Toys R' Us in NYC. They both essentially are the same thing. And to get true happiness outta of it, you must treat it with the same respect you would treat anything of important value. NOt just because of the brand and where it came from.


Today may have been one of the most BEAUTIFUL days I ever experienced. I really wished I had my skateboard today. But I couldnt find it. I'm glad the weather is getting better. I'm ready to start skating again. NOw that I got some great music and even better headphones to rock with now. I think Imma teach NowAndLater how to skate. I wanted to teach Ladybug how to skate. But she isnt a very active person. O well.



KiD CuDi and weed go together like peanut butter and jelly. His mixtape was made for smoking. "That maui Wowie! That Mai wowie!" lol Perfect. So intoxicating and different. You kinda escape into his stories and songs with every verse. Its amazing and kinda scary I like somebody's music this much. Can't wait to meet him. Hope we're doing a track or a movie when we meet. I mean we are from the same home planet.....................;) dik.



Running outta words...... and thoughts..... lol



Peace and much love to all y'all........earthlings,

C.H.-ill.......the Martian......lol

I.....am....the...martian

Martian is my new shit right now. Idk why. Cudi says it best though "Embrace the martian". Just because I don't do everything you do or think like you doesnt mean I'm not LIKE you. I'm just different. Embrace me. Like I do all of you.


Watching music videos and realizing there are no good songs out. and 50 cent is annoying. His whole team is fucking annoying. Especially Banks. One Word: ASS!




Im uber bored. There is nothing to do. But I guess I should just make something to do. Think Imma freestyle soon. Idk why but I feel like it.




KID CUDI IS MY INSPIRATION! Now time out becuase this aint on no gay shit.. I'm being real. He is me. I am him. If I were a famous rapper. Which I'm not. Yet. lol (wishful thinking)



"Poker Face" by Kid Cudi, Common and Kanye West.... hilarious but hard...




Running outta words.... The Martian has arrived.... lol




Peace and much love to all y'all.....earthlings lol,

C.H.-ill

My first.......Poem???!?

Yeah you read it right.. I've decided to post a poem.. Im not a poetry type of person but I guess when you become a fan of good music with lyrical substance and content, you start to take a liking to poetry. so here goes...


by the way Im totally wingin this right now. I think i thought up to lines of this thing and realize I could take it somewhere bear with me blogspot... lol



Entitled: "You aint nuffin but a Dawg!"


"You ain't nuffin but a dawg!"/
Thats what they always tell me,/
And in some ways, you all were right you see,/
Like a dog, the "player" inside keeps a chain on me/
Kinda was made this way by society/
Insecurity eats my heart like.. well a heartworm/
And every thought of commitment makes me cry and squirm/
Being loyal to anbody but myself.. man that shits for the birds/
Why are you this way? you probably ask/
Well why does a dog piss on trees or lick its own ass?/
Its basic instinct/
something you do and you don't think/
besides women like to push me to the brink/
So fuck em. Why love em?/
Its all about me. Who cares if I end up sad and lonely?/
I rather be a stray then tied up to a tired ass tree/
At least then I will be free/
Although, I wouldnt mind if someone rescued me/
I mean if i'm a dog that means If I can trust you, you have my loyalty/
feed me, play with me, love me, I will do the same/
I mean even the best player gets tired of the game/
So show me that you aint like the same/
Or otherwise you will be just another victim to the game/
Another note in my Player's log/
And to you, I just be another dawg.




Kinda wack but I have been messaging on facebook and downloading music. Hope you guys like that though.





Running outta words.... I swear for real this time.. lol



Peace and much love to all y'all,

Chill

Ummm...

Soo I hadda dream last nite about an old friend of mine. We don't really hang out... Well we don't hang out at ALL anymore but I still got mad love for her. And in my dream I said something really inspirational and I woke this morning tryna remember what it was. lol I think I got it (Somebody has probably already said this, I bet):


"Life is a Puzzle. A puzzle with some of the pieces already in place. And some pieces are still in the box. Now you have the picture on the box of what the puzzle is supposed to look like. How you achieve that picture is entirely on you. Pieces already in place are the ones laid by your Parents, Grandparents, Great Grandparents, Brothers, Sisters, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Best Friends, Teachers, Coaches, Mentors and other influences on your life. And of course God. Or Allah. Or Jehovah. These pieces metaphorically represent How to walk, to talk, to breath, to run, to treat people, to think, to feel, to taste, to smell, to hear, to know. We can call these the corners of your puzzle. The pieces that always stay steadfast. The ones you build on. Now the empty spaces in the middle are experiences you haven't filled in yet. These pieces depending upon their shape and size could be anything from, your first sporting event or your first kiss to your first fight. These pieces are easy to add. You know where those pieces fit. We can call these the border. You have your corners but the border inlines the corner making the puzzle a little more larger and detailed. Revealing somewhat of the picture trying to be obtained. You can fill these in easily. Now here comes the hardest part. The actually heart of the picture. The pieces that complete it all. These pieces are very detailed and complex. Pieces are small in size but large in meaning. These pieces go in one at a time to complete the puzzle. These pieces are things like College or life after high school. Finding your true love. Living on your own. Having kids. Discovering your religion (if not already discovered). Finding your career path and BLAZING it. These pieces even have smaller pieces which make these pieces. These even smaller pieces are graduating college. Tried and failed relationships. Bouncing from job to job. Being muslim one minute and buddhist the next. Then praying to jesus when things get hard. FINDING YOURSELF. Its your job to complete your life puzzle. To find the career your either willing to put up with for the rest of your life or the one you will love for the rest of your life (depending on the type of person you are). To find true love and just live in it. To pro-create. To believe in something bigger than yourself (doesn't necessarily have to be a religion). To live. Completion of the puzzle is death (physically and metaphorically). Question I pose to you: How big is your puzzle?"
^
^
^
^
^
^
^
Yeah I dreamt that up. If she is reading by some chance, then that is my last bit advice to you, sis. Get YO SHIT TOGETHER! Everyone else reading please feel free to re-post and read and spread this around to your friends. I realize that in writing this or even thinking this, I wasn't the only one who needed to hear it.







Running outta words.... lol not really.....





Peace and much love to y'all,



Chill

Sooo...

"Its been a long time/ I shouldna left you/ without a dope blog to....read??/"

Lol Hello everybody. It has been quite some time since I blogged but I have been quite busy. NEW JOB! Gotta work in today's society. Plus, we need money around here if we gonna build this studio. Yes, I said studio. I know I said in previous blogs that I would never get into music because its the stereotypical route every black person takes when they can't do anything else BUT...!!! Its not for me its for my younger brother. He's real determined to get his foot into the door. He just D.J.'d his 1st gig and he did his muthafucking thing. (Anybody looking to Book a D.J. contact Baron Drinks @ 302-399-7720 for details and prices.) [SHAMELESS PLUG!] L-M-[C.H.-ILL]-A-O! Now that's outta of the way. Still wanna work on my blog "20 F.A.Q's about Charles "[C.H.-ill]" Hopkins. Also thinking about creating a new blog for our music... maybe http://www.UnCoolMoveMent.blogspot.com/ maybe? Dik (Don't I Know) but we will see. Hope somebody aint reading this and then they steal that shit. WE WILL FIND YOU MUTHAF*CKA! lol nah we ain't no gangsters. Or on no bang bang shit. Just know that if you listen to our music do not expeect no stupid ass "5w@gg3r1f1c 50ulj@ b01" shit or no "Look at how much money we want you to think we're getting and how many girls we think you should think like us and fuck us and Look at the drugs you think I should be selling while im in my gucci/prada sneakers!"... NO. No offense but its not about what you think we should be. We're trying to make songs with concepts that we have EXPERIENCED and we are adding a dash of lyrical complexity. Not too much complexity that you need a webster's next to you to listen to us but metaphorically we are gonna try to be indifferently just like Charles Hamilton, Kid Cudi, and Asher Roth. That's who inspires us so that's the kinda sound your gonna get. Hope you like it. And we hope they like it (speaking about Hamilton, Cudi, and Roth..If they even listen.) WE already been writing and spitten "dry runs" at the crib. "What's a dry run, Chill?" lol well a dry run is basically spitting an entire song without recording it or laying down the beat at least. But we got all the instrumentals we're gonna use for the mixtape. The mixtape's name* is "UnCool Ent. presents Broke and Chill make a mixtape". Hosted and Engineered by DJ Big Chris. Yeah it seems like a burner. Dik. lol We'll see what YOU guys think when you hear it. we got some good guest MC's on there. I'm actually excited about it. Never been this excited about something my whole life. We'll when I got my 1st pro skateboard deck in 2001. just thought I would fill you in on that. Keep your ears watching out for it. I will post music on Imeem and studio seesions on Twitter. Gotta start a twitter 1st. lol but it will be up there for you.



Running outta of words....lol for real....



peace and much love to all y'all,

Chill


*Subject to Change